Welcome to Wise Bread's Best Money Tips roundup. Today, we give you a way to get more coupons, ten tips for shopping safely online, and how to fix a mean beans and cornbread!

Top 5 Articles

How and Why to Buy Coupons on Ebay — Don’t buy 12 newspapers just to get the coupons! Stick with these tips for purchasing them online, and save a fortune. Mummy Deals

10 Essential Tips for Online Shopping Safety — Are you up on encryption and approval certificates? If not, you could be exposing yourself to cyber criminals! Sweating the Big Stuff

Beyond Beans and Cornbread — A yummy, filling, and affordable dish, this method of cooking beans and the accompanying cornbread recipe is delish! Wholesome Mommy

How Would Panhandlers Use Free Credit Cards — This article is fascinating! If given a prepaid credit card, what kinds of purchases would they make — and would they return the card if asked? Toronto Star via Get Rich Slowly

Fabulous Freebies 2010 — Who say’s there’s not such thing as a free lunch (or tech support, cash, and ice cream)? Get a list of amazing freebies here! Kiplinger

Other Essential Reading

6 Signs that Investment is in Bubble Mode — If you’re wondering where we are at in regards to the economy and the attitude of people in general, this piece has some great insight. Moolanomy

When You Can Negotiate an Apartment Lease and When to Walk Away — Know what the current market price is for your lease, and you’ll be in a better position to haggle. This and other tips readily available for your reading pleasure! Money Ning

How To Get Girls if You Live at Home with Mom and Dad — This article is all about perspective. Free laundry and home cooked meals can be seen as a glass-half-full scenario. Financial Samurai

10 Ways to Get Fit for Little or No Money — There are a few new ideas on this list of tips for working out sans gym membership. Len Penzo

Preparing for a Baby: What Do You Really Need? From deluxe swings to baby bottle brushes, there are some things that are necessary — and others, not so much. Find out one blogger’s opinion in this must read list. Cool to Be Frugal

The summer is coming to an end and it's back-to-school time. If you have ever been a student, you'll know that student life is not easy or cheap. With rising tuition costs, high unemployment, and busy schedules, finding ways to manage your time and budget seems impossible. No need to panic! Last week, we showcased back-to-school savings tips. This week, we have 10 iPhone applications that can help you manage your student life.

Rate My Professor

Ever had a lecture where the monotonous professor puts you to sleep? Rate My Professor was one of my favorite sites while at university. Now it's an iPhone application. The app allows you to view other students' comment and rating of professors and write your own review about them. The great thing with the app is that you can tweet it or post it on your Facebook — just be careful what you say!

Evernote

Taking notes in class is not always easy, but Evernote can help. This app takes text and voice notes, which can be synchronized to an online account so that it's accessible everywhere. Although typing on your iPhone all day long may not be the most convenient way to take notes, the voice recording can be very versatile.

Pageonce Personal Finance

Classes, assignments, exams, papers to write... Students have enough to remember. Worrying about when bills are due and managing accounts does not have to be hard. With Pageonce Personal Finance, you can manage all your online accounts anywhere, anytime.

myHomework

Keeping track of assignments can get complicated; myHomework can help you keep your head above water. You can keep track of assignments in different classes and when they are due. You can see all your homework laid out in a calendar view and send homework reminders to friends. It's a free application and with very practical uses for the busy student.

Blackboard Mobile Learn

Blackboard seems to be a very poplar platform used by many schools to communicate with their students. Assignments and grades are often posted on Blackboard, and professors point students to Blackboard for lecture notes and assignments. If your school utilizes Blackboard, then you can have instant access to all the information posted by your school, professors, and classmates.

iStudiez Pro

iStudiez Pro is not a free application ($2.99), but it can be very useful. It helps you keep track of your classes and assignments. It can color-code each assignment with the corresponding class and notify you of their due dates. It may just be the best $2.99 you spend in college.

New Oxford American Dictionary

By the time I graduated I probably went through four dictionaries. (They kept disappearing, somehow.) The New Oxford American Dictionary has over 250,000 entries stored on your phone, which means no internet connection needed. It also includes over 60,000 audio pronunciations.

Chegg

Textbooks are expensive — really expensive. Finding used textbooks is not always easy and even then it may be an outdated edition. Chegg is a textbook rental company with millions of books you can choose from. No need to stand in line for hours at the campus bookstore: All you need is the free Chegg app, the book's title, author or ISBN, or you can simply scan the bar code. The app also has a reminder to return the book so you won't incur any late fees.

Formulus Free

Formulus Free can come in handy whether you love or hate math. The free app helps you find formulas, so no more searching pages of your textbook to find the right one —: they're all at your fingertips.

Free Books

Free Books costs $1.99, but all the books are free. Although you may not find the newest books in the application, it contains over 23,000 books, including most classic books you'll probably study in school. You are probably thinking, "Who can read the whole book on their iPhone?" Well, fear not. This application lets you email the book to yourself. You can download and read it on your computer or notebook.

Going back to school can be an exciting and stressful time; hopefully, some of these applications can help you get through another year of school. If you are looking for more great phone applications, check out this list of 75 phone applications that will save you money

Do you have any favorite applications you'd like to share?

Do you ever come to the end of the money before you run out of month? It's easy to conclude that the problem is that you don't earn enough money (or that you spend too much). In fact, the real problem is almost always that your finances are out of control.

I don't want this post to turn into a comedy routine with a list of items like, "Your finances might be out of control if you ever use a credit card to pay off another credit card." Frankly, if your finances are out of control, you already know it (although you may be in denial). Still, here's a short check list:

• You don't have an emergency fund.
• You don't pay off your credit cards every month.
• You don't know how you'll satisfy your big, high-priority wants (like college for the kids).
• You worry about the bills (or about money in general).

Taking control of your finances is straightforward. I've written articles about most of the steps, but it occurred to me that I've never really put the whole thing together. So, for those of you who have problems that look like a lack of money (or excess spending), here's how take charge of your finances.

Take control by buying what you want

I've carefully buried a certain word in this sentence, because I'm afraid that the word budget will turn off a lot of readers, and I'd like to ease them past it. There are two reasons that people hesitate to make or follow a budget.

The first is that they come to budgets with a sense of guilt. That's crazy. If you'd rather spend money in some other way than what your budget says, don't feel guilty about it: Just change your budget. Your budget is not a constraint, it's a tool for helping you get what you most want.

With that in mind, here are four posts on budgeting:

If Budgeting Isn't Fun, You're Doing It Wrong is all about creating a budget that lets you buy what you want. It's about figuring out what you really want and making sure you're budgeting for those items. Like I said: If you want other stuff more than the stuff that's in your budget, change your budget.

Refactor Your Budget Categories is a short piece on how to organize the categories in your budget. If you have a budget that's working for you, you can skip it. But if you're creating a budget from scratch (or if you're not satisfied with the budget you've been using), it has some useful ideas.

A Better Way to Create a Budget advises against the usual budgeting advice of filling in each budget item with what you spent last month (or last year). Instead, I suggest, start each line item at zero, then figure out what you really need to spend to satisfy your wants and needs in that category.

Your Budget: Envelopes or a Plan? looks at the two main styles of budgeting. I used to follow the envelope model, where I set aside money from each paycheck to cover each expense category, but some years back I quit thinking of my budget as a set of envelopes and started thinking of it as a plan.

Take control by knowing what you're buying

The second common reason that people resist budgeting is that they feel like they're "not the sort of person" who needs to pays attention to every penny. That's not quite as crazy as feeling guilty when they don't follow a budget. It is possible to manage your finances intuitively, and lots of people do. But it's not a sign of moral superiority.

The way to get your finances under control is to create a budget and then track your spending so that you know whether you're following it or not. Neither step has nothing to do with what kind of person you are.

I wrote one post on tracking your spending:

Track Your Spending. Or not. It's on whether the time and effort of tracking is worth the payoff. (And, more important, what the payoff is.)

As I say, it is possible to manage your finances without a budget and without tracking to see if you're keeping to your budget. In fact, most people do just that. If your wants and needs are modest relative to your income, that can work fine. But the less daylight there is between what you earn and what you spend, the more you need to be in control of your finances.

Who's in charge of your finances? You? Or no one in particular?

My boss has asked me in my last two performance appraisals what I enjoy about my job and each time, I say that having this job will make me 10 times wealthier in my personal life. I don't mean that I'm making a ridiculous salary. (Maybe someday...) I mean that looking at borrowers all day lets you see all kinds of slices of life — and hopefully learn from them.

In the short time I've been at my job, I've seen all kinds of borrower financial statements: conservative borrowers and leveraged borrowers; those who got rich by investing in real estate and those who inherited money. Those who work for their parents' company and parents who work for their children. Here are some of the best lessons I've learned from working at a bank.

Don't buy a house you can't afford. Don't buy two houses you can't afford.

Don't roll your eyes at me; I know everyone is saying that in this economy. But I've seen people who have stuck their necks out even in this economy, thinking they could afford that jumbo home because their income would certainly increase in the future. Or their kids need a place in the country to enjoy while they're still young. Or they can sell when the market picks back up, make a profit, and get another nice place. It's never a good idea!

Those who are surviving and thriving in the long term are those who stick to the old rule of a mortgage that is 2.5 times their income or less, and 15-20% down. And that second home in Arizona you bought because it was a short sale? If you can afford to hold onto it, then fine. If not, well, as we say in my department: Hope is not a strategy.

If you make $1 million a year, at least have something to show for it.

No, I don't mean toys. Although they're fun, and awesome, and make you look cool, I can tell you when someone lists $450K of furniture and autos on their financial statement, I see a big fat Zero. That is, depreciating assets don't mean anything when it comes to your net worth.

Do me a favor: If you win the next $64 million lotto jackpot, at least keep a measly 1% or so of after-tax money in CDs or treasuries. I once saw a guy who made nearly a hundred million dollars in one year, who had about $24K in cash. True, he could have been lying on his statement, but really? How nice would it have been if he saved 10%, especially because he lost nearly that same amount the next year?

Don't bet the farm.

This one is a little heartbreaking, but I see it all the time. Tom has had a small, successful restaurant for 25 years. He makes, say, $100K per year. Not a bad deal. But Tom sees others making oodles of money in real estate investing, so he puts two and two together and decides to build an enormous, gourmet restaurant in the next town over. Then he can double his business and own his own piece of investment real estate! He proceeds to build his $5 million restaurant, using all of the $300K he's saved for retirement, pledging his house as collateral on a bank loan and borrowing $1 million from friends and family.

You can guess what happens next. Unless Tom's restaurant does phenomenally well (which restaurants never do), he's DOA. He has lost everything, including his retirement, his house and probably his friends and family. (Side moral: Don't invest in deals like this, people!)

Calculated risks are OK. Investing your retirement money in a well thought-out venture when you're 30 is OK. Pledging your house as collateral on a loan is OK. All of these things separately is OK, but not all at once. You have nowhere to turn, and I see it all the time. I've even seen parents pledge their homes as collateral on an adult child's loan. It goes bad, and grandma and grandpa are homeless in retirement.

So there you have it: the top things I've learned from working at a bank thus far. Although I'm amazed every day at the poor financial choices some people make, let me be clear: I see at least as many (and probably many more) who make great decisions and grow their net worth year after year. With a host of examples, now I know how to avoid the pitfalls, too.

Seen anything similar in your own experience? Share your story!

Money Magazine had an interesting article in the September 2010 issue titled "Do You Have What It Takes To Be Wealthy?" The article comprised of 15 questions aimed to tell you if, indeed, you have a good chance to be rich. I aced it (if you consider having a solid chance of being rich a good thing, that is), but what is the definition of being wealthy anyway? Is it just a number we call net worth? Or is it something else all together?

I was given a tour the other day of a $6 million dollar home. Apparently, the owner bought the piece of land for $4 million and spent $10 million building the custom house on the site. The property was gorgeous (duh!), but the owner couldn't have lived in it for more than three years and he lost $10 million in the process after considering not getting his asking price, agent fees, etc. when it's all said and done.

When you have that kind of money to lose, are you considered rich? (By the way, for those concerned, the owner moved to an even more expensive neighborhood, so this is not one of those overextended home borrower stories.) Miranda started an interesting discussion asking whether you are rich. She claims that your location and personal situation matters a great deal when it comes to the financial portion of the definition of being rich, but I believe it's more than that. I'd argue that being wealthy is much more than having, or earning a specific dollar amount.

Not Worrying About Money

This is much more than having a ton of money. Not worrying about money is more about the ratio of your spending and expectations versus your assets. Some people don't have enough with $12 million, but others can retire comfortably with much, much less. However much money you have, you cannot be wealthy when the worry of money is always on the forefront of your mind.

Having Loving Family and Friends

You might have money, but you aren't rich if you don't have anyone to spend it with. Being rich is also having someone to share your joy and sorrows, and it's having someone to have spend time with too. When you need a shoulder to cry on, can you actually buy one?

Having a Sense of Direction

You can have all the money in the world, but it's very difficult to enjoy life if you don't have a sense of purpose. We talk about finding a passion all the time, but to be quite honest with you, most people never listen. Some are simply too afraid to change their depressing jobs, they are too lazy to repair broken relationships, and they are too proud to admit their mistakes so they can start over. First of all, I don't think these people will be able to maximize their earnings power this way. Even if they could, how does having a bunch of money with a miserable life make them wealthy?

Being rich requires money. There is no doubt about it. But it's much more than that — so much more.

There is something that drives everything we do.

Some actions are driven by love. Others motivated by hate. Money can get most of us moving. Some act based on their religious beliefs.

The Purpose Driven Life reminds us that some are motivated by FEAR. And I believe it. As a minister, I've had the opportunity to peer into the psychological depths of many people. I've seen their raw emotions. When the masks are removed, fear controls much of what we do. Fear poisons us until we are too paralyzed to act.

You are paralyzed by fear when …

• You won't pursue a small business idea because you're afraid that it might not succeed.
   
• Despite the encouragement of co-workers, you're afraid to apply for a new management position.
   
• When you close your eyes, you dream about traveling the world, but you're afraid of what others will say.
   
• You've always wanted to try out for the next dramatic production, but you're afraid you won't get the part.

In life, we are often afraid to do truly courageous things because of what might happen.

• It might not go according to plan.
• I might not make money.
• I might lose my job.
• I might not get the job.
• My friends might not support me.

Today, let's learn one simple life hack that will allow you to really, truly, start living life.

When making an important decision, ask yourself, "What is the worst case scenario?"

Now, I'm not talking about psychological mumbo-jumbo where you try to convince yourself you can do things that you really can't. Nor am I talking about apocalyptic bad news where the worst case scenario is that aliens from another planet might come and eat you for dinner. Literally and logically, what is the worst case scenario that is likely to result from your actions?

Start Living Life Homework

1. Get a pen and paper and write one of your life goals or something you've always wanted to do at the top of the paper.
    
2. Then write this subtitle, What's the worst case scenario?, and list all the things that could possibly go wrong if you pursue that goal.
    
3. Write a number from 1 to 10 beside each listed item. Write a '1' if the worst case scenario is not really likely at all to happen. Write a '10' if it is almost certain to happen.
    
4. Now imagine that everything ranked 3 and up actually did happen. Would you regret your decision? Would you do it again?
    
5. If your answer is yes, then do it.
    
6. If your answer is no, start making whatever changes or adjustments are necessary so that you can soften the blow of a worst case scenario.

Case Study #1: Can mommy afford to stay home?

Sally and her husband, Greg, have a 6-month-old baby, and Sally really wants to stay home with junior. The problem is that they are afraid they won't be able to pay the bills if Sally stays home. If they were able to cut their spending and Sally could earn an extra $300-$500 per month, they would be fine. They have a reasonable financial cushion of $5,000 savings, but they are paralyzed by fear and afraid to do what they really want to do.

What's the worst case scenario?

Sally might not find a way to work from home. She might not like staying at home. The family might not be able to cut enough expenses.

So? If she stays home for six months and doesn't find something she can do from home, then she can just go get another job.

Cast Study #2: Start your own small business.

Tom has been slowly developing a computer software program. The program is selling well and providing a reasonable profit. He'd love to quit his full-time job and focus on building the business, but he's afraid. What if business doesn't pick up?

So, what's the worst case scenario? The business doesn't pick up and Tom is forced to go back to work and finding a part-time job.

Fear As Positive Motivation

For those who face this kind of fear, perhaps you can use your fear to your advantage. Take that fear and use it to help distance yourself from the perceived risk. Increase your emergency funds savings. Spend an extra three months working full-time and part-time to give more cushioning. Jumping off a cliff is very different from jumping off a curb. The less risk, the more likely you are to succeed.

Still, far too many people are driven by fear and let the world pass them by while they watch from the sideline.

Throwing caution to the wind is not the advice here. Typically, those who are the most fearful are those who are most cautious. They don't need to be encouraged to retreat further into their shells, but to take a risk to do what they love. If the worst case scenario is truly frightful, then don't do what you're considering. So, if the worst case scenario means your best alternative is declaring bankruptcy in two months and you'll lose your family in the process — don't do it. But many times, even if the worst did happen, we'd still be glad we took the risk.

Do you think this is good advice or just likely to cause a bunch of people to crash and burn? Is there anything you've been wanting to do, but you know it's just fear that is holding you back?

Every pundit, politician, and economic forecaster (even smarmy financial dilettantes such as myself) have remarked that the recent recession was the worst economic calamity since the great depression.

It's a very dramatic, historic and urgent thing to say — something that you want to have on record that you said — if for nothing else than to be part of history.

Yeah, except it's dead wrong, in a manner of speaking. How would we know whether this past recession is actually the worst recession since the Great Depression? The measure of what is or isn't recession, Gross Domestic Product (GDP), wasn't even invented and implemented until after 1941. And wouldn't you compare it to other recessions, and not to the Great Depression, when there was no SEC, no Social Security, no FDIC no HUD, etc. back then?

So why is GDP so important? Or is it even important anymore? One critic of GDP, Alan Atkisson, even goes so far as to call GDP the "Manhattan Project of Economics."

I wouldn't resort to nuclear and apocalyptic allusions, but I will say that perhaps it's time to reevaluate how we measure economic growth and how we psychologically mind-bomb people by telling them that if there is no GDP growth they have to get scared.

In a nutshell, GDP measures economic growth based on production and consumption of goods and services, or to be more accurate, it is a measurement of "final goods and services officially made" quarter by quarter through a full calendar year.

I asked a friend, a former investment banker for Goldman Sachs and other institions, what he thinks of GDP. He said, "Ask yourself what we're 'officially making' in this country right now and you have my answer."

Elaborating further, he said the formula for GDP is flawed and has outlived its usefulness: Private consumption + Government Spending + (Exports-Imports).

What does that equal? Well in typical I-banker vernacular which I won't repeat here, he said the country, based on this formula of measuring economic health, is headed for the same fate as a nut or bolt twisted and fastened to a wall.

Alternative Measurements

Since I'm a solutions-oriented man, I won't spend the whole post whining. In that vein, there are three upstarts that could, should, or might make a run at the shiny title belt GDP now holds around its bloated consumption-dependent waist.

1. The Index of Sustainable Economic Welfare: Expenditures balance against mutually-assured environmental destruction.
    
2. The Genuine Progress Indicator (GPI): Production growth that actually demonstrates the betterment of human beings.
    
3. The Happy Planet Index (HPI): Are we happy with our stuff? Is killing the planet and contributing to standard of living inequities actually fulfilling in the long run?
    
4. Gross Personal Product (GPP): All of the stuff that we buy: plastics, deliberate obsolescence polymers, and really gross food packages that aren't biodegradable. Oh, and the sticky oil from the Gulf of Mexico — ewww, grosssss.

OK, so the "GPP" is something that you saw here first and exclusively (maybe) — I made it up. But doesn't it start with our personal attitudes? Are you tired of having your homeland measured by cold, impersonal, flawed statistical comparisons? What makes you happy: what you produce or what you consume?

I now leave you with the words of Simon Kuznet, commissioned by the State Department to study political economy in the late 1930s and early '40s and often considered the inventor of GDP. (Ironically, he then essentially said in the 1960s, "don't use this measure.")

Distinctions must be kept in mind between quantity and quality of growth, between costs and returns, and between the short and long run. Goals for more growth should specify more growth of what and for what.

With pressing environmental concerns and an unsustainable economy based more than 70% on the consumption of stuff — more than 90% of which we basically don' t need — those "distinctions" that Kuznet spoke of are what we have to figure out as individuals and as a nation.

Best Money Tips roundup. Today, we share the anatomy of a coupon, how to clean your work laptop before you leave your job, and how to pick the very best airplane seat!

Top 5 Articles

The Anatomy of a Coupon — In case you weren’t aware of all the components that make a coupon a coupon, here’s a nifty guide to getting to know all you coupon’s finer points. I Love Coupon Month

Internet Business Scams: 7 Steps to Keep You Safe — Perhaps one of the most comprehensive lessons in staying away from internet scams, this article is an easy and valuable read! Wealth Pilgrim

What Should I Do to My Work Laptop Before I Leave My Job? If you’re headed out the door soon, and are worried about what you may leave behind on your “work computer”, these tips are essential. Lifehacker

How to Choose the Best Airplane Seat — Wouldn’t it be nice to know exactly which seats in economy have the most leg room? Now you can! Get the clues to a better flying experience in this chart. I Love Charts via Consumerist

5 Ways to Get Your Child Involved in Helping Others — Selfishness can occur when you don’t get enough practice giving of your time and talents. Find out how to prevent this in your child by starting them out on the right path! Parenting Squad

Other Essential Reading

7 Ways to Save Money on Health Care — Do you even know what your plan covers? Why not? Now’s the chance to find out how to really save some cash on your medical care. Health Harbor

Growth Investing Vs. Value Investing — Do you know the difference? Give this a quick read, and you’ll be up to speed in no time! Money Under 30

Freezer Burn: Six Misleading Frozen Meals — Before you get a warm and cozy feeling about eating something as healthy as “Comfort Cuisine Roasted Turkey Breast”, take a moment to read the ingredients. Or just read this article. The sodium and fat content of some of these “healthy” meals will surprise you! Divine Caroline

Beware of False Praise — Are you certain that the compliments you’re getting are useful? True? Here’s how to tell. Productivity 501

Easy Ways to Save Money When Redecorating Your Bathroom — The right lighting and a DIY attitude can really shave some bucks off or your design bill. Which tips have you used successfully? Not Made of Money

Hi. My name is Sonja, and I am crazy.

Now that you know, I can tell you that my husband and I are selling our modest cottage on half an acre to move onto a sailboat with our two small children. Most people aren't downsizing nearly as drastically as we are, but it got me thinking: Quite a number of people are, in one way or another, moving out of larger homes for smaller homes. Quite a lot of these people must have children as well. And as I come up with the solution to the first question people inevitably ask me, “Where will your kids play?” I'd like to pass on the solutions I've been contemplating.

1. Dump the Junk

If your kids are anything like mine, they could do with at least 50% less toys. Make it 75%. Go through the toys, clothes, shoes, and incidentals and have yourself a garage sale. Better yet, see what those toys are going for on eBay. For bigger furniture items, Craigslist will typically get you more cash than a garage sale. Take the cash you get and put it towards a Netflix membership or some small portable play options like video games.

2. Make Friends

This one is a lifeline if you're going to be living in cramped quarters with in-laws. Join groups, get active in the community or a local church and spread out, socially. Visiting with friends, having dinner at someone else's home, or having your kids play in someone's backyard will ease the loss of space and/or land you've had to sacrifice. Plus, it's great to have someone to talk to when things get tough.

3. Use What Your Community Offers

Seriously research parks and recreation and your local library for activities that are offered throughout the year for free or very low cost. It's a great way to feel connected within your community, and it gives your kids things to do so they don't talk so much about how hard it is to share a room with their baby brother.

4. Get a Family Pass

Use any cash you may have saved in the downsize to put towards a family pass. Look into children's museums, the zoo, theme parks, local swimming pools — whatever appeals to your kids the most and fits your budget. If you're out of work, ask about scholarships. Many places will give serious discounts. All you have to do is ask.

5. Look for a Community Garden

If you're missing your yard, look for a community garden to plant some greenery. If there isn't one, maybe you're the person who can organize it and get it started. Go in front of the community council and bring your kids while you propose a local garden. Not only will you be able to get involved, but you'll be teaching them the value of seeing a need in the neighborhood and filling it. Some community gardens donate a portion of their vegetable harvest to local food banks.

6. Volunteer

While I'm on the subject, the quickest way to get out of a funk is to do something nice for someone else. If you find yourself cramped, cranky and cantankerous, take the kids and go to an elderly home. Ask the front desk if there's anyone who needs a visit, or if they could use any help. Again, this is a great opportunity to teach your kids the value of reaching out. And who knows, you may walk away with another valued friendship.

Downsizing usually happens because life throws us a curve ball. A divorce, sudden death, a job loss, or even having to move in to care for an ailing parent can cause stress on a family. It makes for some very tough choices. Keep the books, leave the stuffed animals. We had to give our precious black lab away (which was much harder on me than the kids).

The best lessons in life aren't easy. Compassion, empathy and resilience can only be learned through tough times. It's good to keep that perspective as we watch our kids getting what's really important. And that doesn't include your own room complete with a princess-themed bed. Sorry, Josephine.

If you have any ideas that have worked with your recent downsize, I'd love to hear them.

I noticed this morning that I have gained five pounds. Conventional wisdom says it's time to shell out to join a gym, or if I want to save money, dust off that jogging stroller.

But what does conventional wisdom know? A recent article in Time magazine points out that our belief that exercise is essential to weight loss is a recent development, and — this shocked me — not well supported by research.

That's right: For most people, exercise is useless for weight loss.

It sounds like complete crazy talk, yet the article cites solid-sounding research and academic experts saying just that. One recent study looked at overweight women, some of whom were assigned to work out with a trainer for different lengths of time, alongside a control group that did not work out. They didn't change their eating habits. All the groups on average lost weight, but the women who worked out did not lose significantly more than those who didn't.

What's going on?

The study's authors cite "compensation." That is, working out makes you hungry, so you eat more. You also might move around less for the rest of the day after you work out. The article also points out that most people overestimate how much food they can indulge in before they have consumed more calories than they just burned in their workout.

This would explain something that has baffled me since chidlhood: The overweight mail carrier. My dad delivered the mail as a kid, and I never understood how many of his colleagues, even though they were on walking routes, not driving routes, could have such big bellies. The answer, apparently, is that being out on that route all day made them very hungry.

All this leads me to think about the growing emphasis on "being active" in America right now, coming from everyone: from the schools to the scapegoats of childhood obesity, like children's television and McDonald's itself. The hope on McDonald's part seems to be that society will be OK with kids consuming their megacalorie meals as long as they do some jumping jacks first.

Look at the great amount of resources expended for the cause of physical fitness already. While I am not disputing that it's unhealthy to be sedentary, the experts quoted in this article contend that the kind of free exercise that we have traditionally incorporated into our day is just as healthy as organized sports for kids and treadmills for adults.

The article even quotes the head of Harvard's Prevention Research Center on Nutritional and Physical Activity wondering if the whole McDonald's playground idea was a ploy to get kids to eat more.

"I know it sounds kind of like conspiracy theory, but you have to think, if a kid plays five minutes and burns 50 calories, he might then go inside and consume 500 calories or even 1,000," Steven Gortmaker told Time.

Once I started thinking about it, I realized that working out is expensive in many ways. It might be worth it (at least for some people) if it increases your overall sense of well-being or prepares you for an activity you enjoy, like touring cities on foot or climbing a mountain. And of course, many if not most people who work out do it so they will look better and be more attractive than the gym rat on the machine two rows over. But in order to decide if something is worthwhile, you should take an honest look at what it costs.

Gym Fees

The most obvious, and most avoidable, cost of fitness. For those who have joined the extreme home workout trend, those 30 Day Shred and P90X DVDs ain't cheap either.

Time

This is a major one for parents of small children like me. If a leisurely walk with my children is as good or almost as good for me as an hour at a gym with them in the daycare, I'm unlikely to choose the latter. And with my husband already away from the kids for 10 hours or more on a weekday, does it make sense for him to use one of the remaining hours at the gym?

Increased Calories Consumed

People who work out for weight loss set out to burn calories they won't be replacing. But it doesn't usually work out that way, simply because our bodies are programmed to prevent that from happening. And what about people who work out to build muscle mass and intentionally increase their caloric intake to help build it?

I recently saw an exhibit at the Museum of Science and Industry showing everything various Chicagoans ate in a day. One was an iron-pumping construction worker who consumed something like 12,000 calories, much of it protein. He obviously felt that the cost of purchasing all that extra food was worthwhile, but in a world where we are increasingly conscious of the environmental toll of food production, is it really sustainable for some people to consume six times as many calories as are needed for healthy survival?

Injuries

With all the talk about how healthy it is to stress your cardiovascular system, but there is little talk about the increased risk of injury that occurs when one switches from a brisk walk to lifting weights, running, or participating in sports.

As for those five extra pounds I'd like to shed, I'm now planning to cut back on the ice cream and walk my next errand rather than drive it, rather than set aside time for a daily workout. I still plan to join a local gym once my baby is a little older, but mainly because it offers a fitness activity that I truly enjoy: indoor rock climbing. After reading that article, I am a lot less likely to force myself through any fitness routine that I loathe in the perhaps unrealistic expectation of great weight loss and health benefits.

For those who work out in an organized fashion, do you feel that the benefits exceed the costs?

This post contains affiliate links to Amazon.com, which will surely increase my sense of well-being if you use them to shop.